I don’t really consider myself much of a worrier. I am more of a glass-is-half-full, it’ll-all-work-out kind of gal. To the point that my dh has asked me repeatedly what color the sky is in my world. (I always assure him it is very rosy and that the skies are a clear, clear blue.)
But, sometimes an overactive imagination or something that is a real unknown to me will get me… and I can worry. Like yesterday, I was worried about my daughter. Her education. Her opportunities. Her progress. You see, we have a meeting with nearly a dozen school people (teachers, therapists, etc.) on Monday to discuss, well, everything. Or at least it was starting to feel like everything.
When your child is on an IEP (individualized education plan), which basically means that they are receiving special education services; every 3 years they test, evaluate, observe, and analyze the child to determine placement, continuation of services (or not), etc., etc., etc. and that time is upon us.
It sure seems that there is more known about a child with special needs than nearly any typical child. They are tested, tracked, and evaluated nearly constantly. And, to a certain degree, that has to be done to know how to help them continue to learn and really I’m all for more information rather than less. I think I’d like to know EVERYTHING if it were actually possible (yes, even the date of my own death… morbid, I know).
So, it is probably the not-knowing, what-if part that gives me pause. What if she is doing so well that she could lose services? and scarier than that… what if she’s not? She’s lost service time already and I’m glad because that means she’s doing well and I’m not glad because that means she’s not getting as much help. It feels like a weird place and yesterday was like that. I just had to take a deep breath (ok, maybe a few) and in the spirit of full disclosure, shed just a couple of tears — which isn’t so unusual for me, I guess, and talk to someone else who’s been there, also not so unusual for me since I find other perspectives helpful and connections reassuring.
Now to adopt my theme song for the weekend. Que sera, sera… whatever will be, will be. Since, however it goes on Monday, it’ll all work out… with glasses half-full.
I hate being a perfectionist. It sometimes can stop me in my tracks. I wanted to learn more about wordpress so that I could add photos. So, I stopped writing while I tried to sort it out. I didn’t actually got it all sorted, but I did figure out a few things. So here’s an idea of the post that I wanted to do, but really, really wanted to have photos in.
I got to meet Cat Cora! And she inspired me to do some cooking. She did a cooking demo at Macy’s that I attended thanks to the Blog Pantry. I had a great seat in the front row to get a great shot of her with the dishes she prepared for us that night.
Here are my versions of her dishes. They were great and I enjoyed recreating them. It is a lot more work when you don’t have people prepping stuff ahead of time, but my mom happened to be in town for this fun and she helped too. I love cooking with others. It is just more fun and makes all the chopping go by quicker.
Physics. It’s great. Except when it’s not. One of Newton’s laws of physics has been true law around here for awhile. You know the one, “an object at rest tends to remain at rest, and an object in motion tends to remain in motion”. The thing is, I’m not sure if I’ve been more at rest or in motion (just not in my direction). It feels more “at rest”, but I know I’ve also been going through the motions of the everyday things that need to be done.
I want to write. I need to write. I love to run into a friend who misses my writing. It lets me know that someone is listening. Though that scares me a bit too to be honest. I want to learn more. I want to do more. I want to be more. And, I shall start by writing more. Let’s get in motion and set a course. Is there anything you want to do more of?